Okay. Deep breath. Here goes:
Look. I have some feelings about remakes and I feel like I need to get them off my chest. Every time I hear about a classic sci-fi franchise getting rebooted yet another goddamn time, I want to throw up.
First of all – before we go any further – let me clarify that I am aware this is something of a controversial opinion to hold. There are some fantastic remakes out there (Mad Max: Fury Road springs immediately to mind) that pay homage to their source material while updating them for modern audiences. Those are GREAT. People should make more movies like those.
No, what I’m talking about are the ones that take everything good about the original film and replace it with pointless action, soulless visual effects, and an overall lack of anything resembling wit or intelligence.
2018 can go fuck itself, am I right?
For evidence of this viewpoint, let us travel back to 2008, when Hollywood decided that the best way to honour the science fiction classic The Day the Earth Stood Still was to remove all of what made it good and substitute explosions and half-hearted references instead.
I grew up watching the original 1951 film. I can’t remember how old I was exactly but I do remember it being on one Sunday afternoon when I was supposed to be doing something else outdoorsy. Despite having more bark than bite, it nonetheless captured my attention – mainly for its portrayal of humanity’s capacity for violence… and how that sometimes stops us from moving forward.
Klaatu was otherworldly, yes… but he was also patient and kind. You could feel the sincerity and weight of his mission to educate humans about how dangerous we are. Then I watched the reboot with Keanu Reeves as the new Klaatu. Kind of stole the same alien-as-saint premise, if you ask me… though I suppose they were going for robotic monotone? Doesn’t matter. There was nothing “alien” about that movie. It felt decidedly human in all of the worst ways.
Another thing that bugged me about the reboot was how they replaced Klaatu’s lesson with mindless destruction. The entirety of the 1951 film was grounded in this fear that maybe we MIGHT be too violent and too paranoid to be let into the galactic community. It asked the question: Are we forever doomed to destroy anything that frightens us before trying to understand it?
The reboot just wanted to see stuff blow up. No deep dive into the human condition for this picture. Just rubble.
Don’t even get me started on Total Recall (2012). Oh goddammit.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve watched the 1990 original at least once a year. Probably more. It was one of those films that truly sucked me into the sci-fi genre and got me hooked on movies in general.
That colony on Mars was dirty and worn-down. The sets and effects looked lived-in. When Quaid pulled that tracking device out of his nose, I actually felt like I could reach out and touch his future-calloused skin.
By contrast, the newer Total Recall felt sterilized and generic. Much like Keanu Reeves’ portrayal of Quaid, every visual seemed digitally perfected down to its finest details. There was no grit to be found.
I kept waiting for that thrill of wonder to wash over me like it did the first few times I watched the original but it never came. All I felt was competent filmmaking churned out by robotic directors devoid of passion.
Why do you hate the new stuff, Dan? Because RoboCop (2014) came along and slapped me in the face while asking why.
Look. The original RoboCop was badass. Sure it was an action film about a bloody cyborg murdering criminals… but it was ALSO a searing commentary on corporate culture and the media.
Sure, I was too young to understand a lot of it back in the day, but I knew it was there. subTEXT, people. When I revisited the film recently, it HIT DIFFERENT. Having worked in tech for the past four years, I have SERIOUSLY felt that RoboCop future.
So what did they do with the reboot? Strip it of all that good stuff and make it into… another action film about a cyborg murdering people? Is that it? Did you SEE the original movie?
I will concede that Star Trek deserves a pass. JJ Abrams definitely deserves credit for revitalizing the franchise. And to be fair, I know kids these days are watching those movies and being introduced to a world I love. So yay for that!
But…
They don’t spend much time talking about ethics on the rebooted Trek. At least not the kind of ethics that made me tune into the Next Generation after school each day.
“What is the right course of action when defending oneself?” “How do we approach alien cultures without imposing our own values?” “What is it that actually makes us human?” These are the types of questions I fell in love with while watching science fiction. These are the types of conversations I wanted to be a part of when I grew up.
The new entries in the franchise are too busy blowing up planets to ask those questions. And that’s a damn shame.
Look. There’s nothing wrong with remakes. Heck, I even listed a few good ones up top. My problem is with how lazy Hollywood has gotten with preserving our cherished pop culture.
Mad Max understands what made the originals great, and then built upon that foundation without sacrificing what fans loved about them. The same goes for Blade Runner 2049. Denis Villeneuve GETSBlade Runner and was respectful enough of the original to let that shine through in his sequel.
But for every solid reboot or thoughtful remake, there are about fifteen abysmal cash grabs that pinch-hit major plot points and call it a day. They’re not here to understand why these stories mattered to us. They’re just here to make sure their names are on a paycheck.
I test video games for a living. I spend all day looking for bugs. Films like these are the bugs in Hollywood’s machine.
Sure, the graphics are shiny and new. The runtime is optimized; the editing is tight. But open up these remakes and you’ll find the heart of these stories has become corrupted, leaving behind hollowed-out corpses of movies we loved.
Science fiction is having a resurgence right now. Movies like Blindspotting and Snatch Factory are proving you can make a sci-fi movie on a damn shoestring budget these days. Between streaming services and indie game developers, there’s more opportunity for creative stories to find audiences than ever before.
But every time I hear about a new Star Wars film in development or some property I grew up with being handed off to some shiny new studio…I can’t help but feel this golden age of science fiction is being tarnished by corporations afraid of taking risks on new ideas.
Maybe I’m just old and curmudgeonly. In 20 years, there’ll be young filmmakers just like me complaining that someone took plastic screwdrivers to the MCU.
Until then, I’ll be up in my momplex streaming the films that made me love science fiction whenever someone decides to “upgrade” them. They’ll always exist. Somewhere.
Logan lives in Minneapolis with too many consoles and just enough opinions. He explores how sci-fi plays differently across games, TV, and film—celebrating great world-building and calling out lazy tropes. Expect passionate takes, sarcasm, and the occasional Mass Effect reference.